Cheyef 7alak: Sectarian Upbringing

June 27, 2012 By 5 Comments

This video was released by Cheyef 7alak a few days ago. They’re the people who are naming and shaming stupid and reckless drivers, and have gone a step further in highlighting the bad and corrupt in this country.

It’s so sad that in 2012, people still believe. What’s sadder is not that they believe in Gods and whatever, but that the quality of their lives, morals and social skills dip and create a precursor for the retards that burn tires and shoot each other up for whatever deity they believe in (it’s usually a god sprinkled with some poverty, illiteracy and a pinch of petrodollars).

The video might seem stupid and naive, but I am absolutely certain some of you people believe what these kids are saying and think the exact same way. Maybe when you see this, you will realize how stupid you are being and stop following old men in black robes and funny hats and follow the only man who can pull that off: Darth Vader! Woot woot!

But seriously, it’s a painfully true and embarrassing video, and I hope you won’t raise your kids that way some day…

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Filed Under: Fail and Win Ads, Thoughts

World Blood Donor Day 2012: Thanks DSC!

June 27, 2012 By 1 Comment

Last Sunday, I went down from Ehden very early to be part of the World Blood Donor Day festivities with DSC. The plan was to have a lot of fun, meet everyone there, donate lots of blood and platelets, listen to awesome music, laugh at Nemr’s jokes and whoop some Korean ass.

All of the above was accomplished, with the Forum de Beyrouth parking lot hosting the event. We were guilty of creating a traffic jam, with motorists parking on the side to see what all the commotion was about. What’s even more awesome is that some of them even came down, wore a red t-shirt and stood with us in the giant human blood drop.

Young, old, disabled and even pets all participated in the day’s activities. Stands with games, goodies, food and of course a blood donation center kept everyone busy. And if you’re done touring them, you could rock-climb a wall or repel off a crane, all for absolutely nothing.

At the end of the day, more than 2000 people were all laughed out, happy and many of them 450 milliliters lighter after donating blood. A total of 150 bags of blood were sent to St Jude’s Children’s Cancer Center thanks to all of you guys.

So, I would like to thank DSC from the bottom of my heart for all the fun, wholesome activities. I’d like to thank Nemr, Meen, Treehoppers and Jammit for entertaining us all throughout the day. I’d like to thank each and every person that was there that day and helped make WBD 2012 even moe awesome than last year’s!

Check more than 500 additional photos here

Filed Under: NGO/Charity

Skydiving Simulator in Beirut Going to Jounieh [UPDATE]

June 27, 2012 By 1 Comment

A couple of weeks back, I wrote about the brand new skydiving simulator near Citymall. Well, this morning, it appeared as though the fun attraction that created some buzz with everyone, was being dismantled… I haven’t been able to contact the people behind it, but I personally am bummed it’s closing down. Let’s hope it’s just switching venues!

UPDATE

I was able to finally get through, looks like they’re just relocating to Jounieh for a few days, then will be back. That’s a relief!

Filed Under: Leb

MAMNOU3.com: Please Let Me Appear as a Guest!

June 27, 2012 By Leave a Comment

You all know I’m vehemently against any form of censorship, especially when a priest or a sheikh is behind it. For example, I wasn’t much of a Lady Gaga fan, but when priests moved to ban “Born This Way”, I became her number 1 fan, outdoing my gay friends and even burning her CDs to blast on my car stereo.

So, naturally, I’m ecstatic about Mamnou3.com. It’s a web-series that seeks to mockingly portray how Lebanon’s censorship bureau functions. These retards who banned books like “The Da Vinci Code” and many others based on the Maronite church’s recommendation, as well as most things with a reference to Israel in it based on the Hezbollah’s “recommendations”, are getting what they deserve.

It’s a beautiful, hopefully hilarious portrayal of a bitter reality in a country that prides itself on freedom of speech. That’s a cause I believe in deeply, and I will take this opportunity to shamelessly promote myself as an extra on the show, maybe in future seasons. I’d do anything, even just dress up as a tree!

Stay up to date with them via their website here.

Filed Under: Artsy Fartsy, Leb

Another Name Blacklisted: Gaby Layoun for His Wretched Crime

June 27, 2012 By 9 Comments

Remember when I talked about the Selfish Movement? Well, I know I haven’t been publicizing it much, but trust me, awesome things are coming.

Unfortunately, yesterday I heard even more news that supposed “Change and Reform” minister Gaby Layoun sold whatever dignity he still had after his history book fiasco (a Maameltein sex worker has more dignity than that btw).

A two, thousand, and, five, hundred, year old Phoenician port was bulldozed by the evil corporations famous for bulldozing buildings while its tenants are still inside so it can progress Hariri and co’s plans to screw the country over and make billions in the process, you know, like buying a meter for sea 12$ on the Beirut Waterfront and now charging us millions to even dream of owning something there.

Honestly, I doubt that the lying, double-crossing Gaby Layoun would dare run for elections, but if he does, we will definitely make sure he fails. Just like Gilberte Zouein, Nabil Nkoula and Ghassan Mkhaiber, who are derailing the stop domestic violence against women law in parliament.

Every day, I lose more and more faith in this country. But every day, I see people like me, who have zero respect for the politicians and prostate-prone old men in robes and those they protect. And I hope that if we can’t fix this broken excuse of a country, we can at least make the scumbags pay for their crimes.

Blacklisted MPs/Ministers so far:

  • Gaby Layoun
  • Gilberte Zouein
  • Nabil Nkoula
  • Ghassan Mkhaiber

Note: I know they are all Christian, and FPM. But that’s exactly why I want them to pay, because we expected more from them. I wouldn’t expect Emad El Hout, a backwards religious fundamentalist, to want to stop raping women. But, I expect Mkhaiber, a self-proclaimed human rights advocate, to stand up for your moms and sisters and daughters. I expect Zouein, a woman herself, to make it illegal for her to get raped (not than anyone would actually rape her, but still).

Also, in sectarian terms, Sunnis and Shiite will always vote the same way. It’s the Christians who are the swing vote, and why I believe we should focus our efforts on the Christian electorate and MPs.

Filed Under: Leb, Thoughts

Revisiting Childhood Lebanon: Baalbek Edition

June 19, 2012 By Leave a Comment

After my impromptu review of the Telefrique a few weeks back, Lori suggested I should do more posts about places we used to go to as kids, but now rarely even think of visiting. Luckily for us, a lunch at Kefraya last weekend ended us up in Baalbek, at the Ancient Roman ruins.

It was amazing. The ruins were breathtaking, all-accessible and well-kept. You wouldn’t normally expect that by something the Lebanese government is in charge of, but the place wasn’t too shabby. They even had parking spaces (most of which were actually paved).

I won’t review the ruins, I’ll instead embed these amazing panoramic shots Lori took. I will however give you some advice after our experience. The street vendors surrounding the ruins are unbelievably annoying. They latch on to you, invade your personal space, grab your arm, put stuff on your head or around your neck and practically beg on their knees and would even wait for you to finish your whole tour is you said something like “maybe when I’m done…”

They sell garbage like fake old coins, poorly-printed scarves, poorly-woven cowboy hats and other completely useless and irrelevant things. Escaping them is almost impossible, and you gotta be a real mean and nasty person to break free. That sorta dampens your mood going in and out. But inside, you’re in a completely different, more grand world and time. And now I’ll leave you with the photos.

Entrance fee is 10,000 LBP if you’re Lebanese, 15,000 LBP if you’re not. The road is fairly good between Baalek and Zahle, the problem is getting to Zahleh with all the potholes and crazy truck drivers! All in all, it would be an awesome weekend activity if you take the day to tour Baalbek and maybe have lunch on the Berdawni River or somewhere in Taanayel.


Filed Under: Leb

World Blood Donor Day and Why You Should Be There

June 19, 2012 By 2 Comments

I love DSC. It’s one the NGOs I’ve worked with since the beginning and have followed it on this blog for the past 2 and a half years. Last week, DSC got together its donors and organized a very fond thank you for the most committed of the bunch.

Mr Tinawi, 100+ donations

After a presentation by Dr Rola Saad from the Children Against Cancer NGO who gave amazing insights and numbers into cancer in children in Lebanon and how blood and platelet donation is instrumental in keeping the children alive and stable long enough for the cancer to be characterized and treatment begun.

Then, we heard from a local celebrity, Wissam Sabbagh, and how he is trying to promote blood donation via airing it on national TV, to show reluctant potential donors how easy and pain-free it is to donate blood.

That’s when a true hero took to the stage. Dany Tinawi, a Jamhour professor, has donated well over 100 times in the past 33 years. Just to put that in perspective, I’ve been able to donate a total of 14 times since I turned 18. So, hopefully, in 29 years, I’ll be able to boast the same number this bike-riding, eco-friendly, human rights activist with an awesome sense of humor.

Then, certificates and souvenirs were distributed to donors who’ve donate at least 10 times, 25 times, 50 times, 75 times and 100 times! I know it’s “donner sang compter” (give without counting) but it feels hella good to get a nod of appreciation for once, and for that I thank DSC deeply, as I now proudly display my small trophy and certificate on the mantlepiece in my room.

Myself accepting the awesome gesture by Founder, Yorgui Teyrouz

But, donors are not everything we need. We also need friends and donors of time. As you all know, last year we broke the record for the biggest human blood drop shape at the Saint Joseph School Cornet Chehwan with over 1300 people standing in formation. Korea beat us to it, and DSC is planning to reclaim the title THIS Sunday.

Here’s why you should come:

1- Nemr is Hosting

Nemr has been the talk of the town recently with his whole Myriam Klink fiasco. Why not get a chance to go to a free event and have him host and joke for your pleasure only?

2- Meen, Jammit and Treehoppers

If you’re a band fan, DSC’s gotten 3 of the most popular local bands in Beirut. They will all be performing live, making the entertainment level soar 3-fold!

3- Free

You don’t pay a cent for a night full of fun people, acts and activities

4- Your Chance to Help

You can donate on the spot (for the St Jude’s Children’s Cancer Center in Lebanon), get a free blood test or just know more about blood donation. If you can’t donate blood for whatever reason, this is your chance to help DSC by just showing up and showing solidarity with the NGO with over 15,000 lives touched or saved so far in Lebanon.

5- Korean Payback

They knocked us out of the FIFA World Cup qualifiers… It’s time we knock them out of the Guinness Book of World Records!

So, RSVP here and I’ll see you all on Sunday at 4:00 PM. Show up, don’t let us down, it’s just a few hours on a Sunday afternoon, full of awesome local live acts and plenty of fun stuff!


Filed Under: NGO/Charity, Thoughts

The Bell Tower vs The Minaret: How Embarrassing and Childish…

June 18, 2012 By 23 Comments

So, the late Hariri decided that dozens of churches and mosques for downtown Beirut’s population of 0 was not enough. That’s why, with the permission, blessing and free land from the Beirut Archbishop, he built the mosque that rivals the Taj Mahal in its infinitely useless space.

It seems though, the goodwill and faith of the Maronite church was severely abused by Hariri, and the St George Cathedral looks more like a chapel now next to the gargantuan mosque.

What would you have them do? Why build another utterly useless structure just as high as the minarets on the Mohamad el Amin mosque of course! I swear, if you draw a line between the crescent and cross of the new bell tower, it’ll be perfectly parallel to the horizon.

To me, this is absolutely hilarious and somewhat saddening. How petty and childish these old men in robes are. Makes me shake my head in shame too though, for instead of something nice like a library or cultural center, we get empty places of worship people rarely ever use.

If I didn’t already receive so many death threats from so-called “believers” in peace and love and god, I would go as far as saying the behavior is similar to what teenage boys do in locker rooms when they compare a certain body part’s size and length… But of course, I will say no such thing!

What do you guys think?

Filed Under: Thoughts

Iris Beach Club Opening

June 16, 2012 By 2 Comments

Not a lot of you might’ve heard, but the group behind White, Iris, Bonita Bay and many other projects has taken over a beach resort in Dammour, south of Beirut.

The opening was last night, and despite the somewhat wonky weather, plenty of people showed up. The resort is somewhat isolated from other beaches, with its own road and gate. Sometimes, it gets annoying when several beaches are adjacent, making the music collide, traffic too much and security over the top.

It’s divided into several areas each with its own feel and theme and purpose. To your right after going in, are private lounges with their own jacuzzis you could reserve. To the other side, is the kitchen and restaurant area. Directly in front of the restaurant area is a huge bar section, with couches and high tables that stretch onto the wooden deck near the sea.

A T-shaped shallow pool separates two segments of beach beds, one type high and narrow, the other low and wide. There’s also another, smaller bar on the other side, which extends several meters into the sea with large beach beds lining the mini pier.

The opening was lovely and I am fairly certain I was the first person to swim in the Iris Beach pool! Apart from the sea food and open bar, there was a wicked awesome merry cream ice cream machine… Can you imagine my joy at open Merry Cream?! The waiters eventually started getting me one automatically when they see me empty-handed =P

The night featured mostly very bassy lounge music, and at around 9:30PM, The Poptarts performed hits from Adele, Imani, Alicia Keys and other artists that fit perfectly with the mood.

Now to the important part, the entrance fee. In the weekdays, it’ll be 30,000LBP per person and on the weekend it’s 40,000LBP, keeping it up to par with other beaches.

Verdict: It’s perfect because it’s smaller and cozier, more private and chill than most beaches
Price: 30,000 LBP weekdays – 40,000 LBP weekends
Atmosphere: laid-back, private
Music: Loungy music, sometimes band
Staff: Friendly, very helpful and good sense of humor
Location: Damour, South of Beirut

Filed Under: Clubs

Moulinex Tonite!

June 16, 2012 By Leave a Comment

It’s very simple:

  • My two favorite party crews are doing it
  • It’s open bar
  • It’s at St Georges, right next to Zaitunay Bay with the awesome backdrop of Beirut
  • It’s called Moulinex
  • There’s a guy from Portugal called Moulinex
  • You can swim
  • It’s open bar
  • It’s 50 thou

That’s why you should go to Moulinex tonite, and not some big shot club. This event is definitely endorsed, and hopefully I’ll see you there tonite, and push you into the pool.

Check the boring details here

Filed Under: Endorsements

Outbox Short Film Festival Review

June 15, 2012 By 1 Comment

Lori and I were at St Elmo’s last nite, and heard about the Outbox Short Film Festival happening on the stairs near the ancient Roman Baths in DownTown Beirut.

So, we decided to check it out, but made it a bit late. However, we were just in time for my favorite type of short: animated! There were several international ones displayed, but I must say, my absolute favorite was the first movie played. It was called “Chick” and it’s a very nicely drawn, trippy, funny and witty story about what appears to be a human-like prostitute which prepares herself for her clients, then gets paid with the one eye these human-like being have, only to reveal a long line of eager men waiting to have their go.

Another animated short I loved was an Australian one, called Nullarbor. It’s about a young guy who’d do anything for a cigarette on an open highway in the desert. Reckless driving, speeding and a lot of other hilarious events in 3D end up with him and his fellow motorist supposedly carrying cigarettes, at the edge of a cliff near the water. They find out that the cigarettes pack was indeed just some gum!

The last segment was the Lebanese shorts one. I loved the second one, like a LOT. It’s by Christel Whaibe and it’s called “His Name Is A Long Story“. It’s a super cute short about a boy with a freakishly long name. I’m not gonna spoil this one for you, for I hope you’ll watch it yourself! It is a very light-hearted, hilarious, cute, beautifully shot, brilliantly acted out and the music actually fit the theme! It’s one of those movies you instantly fall in love with but you’re not sure exactly why cause it’s all perfect!

The one after it, “What If” was an absolute disaster. It was over 18 minutes of a bald girl and a guy writing to each other on a piece of paper while they’re sitting across the table. The handwriting is not legible, and the subtitles had mistakes like “throughout the window” and “throwed” (Antaww)

All in all, it’s a fun, free, interesting and entertaining festival and I’m glad we went there instead of some club. You’ll definitely bump into someone you know too, and your opinion does matter, since you can vote for the film you liked most and help your favorite movie makers get the prize! There are 3 more days! Check out their website for the schedule.

Filed Under: Artsy Fartsy

FASHAL – The Only Legit Reason to Park on the Highway

June 14, 2012 By 2 Comments

Filed Under: Fail
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