Why Votes for Klink and Zorba Were Justified
A lot of folks have been weighing in on the bizarre, humiliating parliamentary session that ended up with Aoun taking the oath of the presidency. In the voting sessions, names like “Myriam Klink” and “Zorba the Greek” popped up. I say sessions in plural because an MP kept putting an extra ballot each time, forcing a re-vote twice before Aoun’s three-decade wait was over and he was finally sworn in as president of the republic.
I think those “joke” votes though were justified, and honestly, I wish more MPs did that, and for several reasons.
It’s the Respect this Election Deserved
The mockery on Halloween at the Lebanese parliament deserved these kinds of votes and stunts. After 30 months of Aoun and his allies shutting down parliament and grinding the government to a halt till everyone agrees beforehand to go down and vote for Aoun, is not something that deserves the respect of the taxpayer nor MPs whose arms weren’t twisted by the Aoun-Hezbollah camp into voting for the former chief of the Lebanese Army.
The only times this parliament met was to increase their salaries or extend for themselves and when the US threatened to impose financial sanctions on Lebanon if we didn’t update laws regarding banking secrecy and funding terrorism. The same parliament, which extended for itself twice, and which Aoun himself has called illegitimate, yet never actually resigned and was happy to force it to vote for him as president. Who’d respect that institution?
That kind of parliament with this kind of MPs deserves as much respect and seriousness as one of Myriam Klink’s photoshoots and TV appearances. Heck, Klink deserves more respect for sticking to her positions and not flip-flopping as much as Aoun and the rest of his 126 colleagues. More so because despite all the sexist vitriol directed at her, she pays no heed and does what she wants and has garnered a fanbase as loyal to her as her detractors are committed to shaming and bringing her down.
However, Klink isn’t the issue here. It’s the MP who wrote in her name. I support that decision and think it was a brilliant way to highlight several issues with this pre-approved election theatrical piece.
Demonstrating That Vote Doesn’t Really Count
The MP who wrote in Zorba and Klink was trying to say that his or her vote doesn’t really matter. Most of the MPs were gonna vote like their chieftain dictates, even if it means betraying their entire set of ideals and constituents’ thoughts and sentiments. With Aoun pre-approved, the election process was nothing more than a formality, and highlighting the uselessness of the vote by writing in a name that would cause controversy, was brilliant.
As for those arguing that the MP should respect his mandate and act properly as his voters expect him to. Well, if any of those MPs cared about their mandate (which they extended for themselves illegally without the taxpayers’ consent) then why didn’t they remember that in the 29 months of presidential vacuum and lack of legislative work? Were they hibernating?
Only Way of Showing Discontent
After Frangieh asked the non-Aoun supporters to drop in blank ballots instead of his name, the usual way to protest the legitimacy of a candidate or voting process was kind of hijacked. White paper now meant supporting Frangieh versus Aoun, which some MPs might not feel is the case for them. So, letting it be known that they disagree with this weird set of coalitions and backroom deals under the table in such a funny, controversial way was genius.
In other words, it was a smart way of showing that you don’t approve of this undemocratic farce and how little you respect the candidate and the electoral body that voted him in: by voting for pop culture references that have no place in a presidential election in a dust-gathering, highly-fortified Lebanese parliament that has been off-limits for taxpayers for years now.
Epic Trolling
For many of Aoun’s diehard supporters and newly gained “children” given they are all calling him “our father” now and “father of the nation”, this was amazing bait. They see him as a hero valiantly holding his ground no matter what to get what is “right” (more like “right-wing”). They do not see it as a stubborn old man who’d rather watch the country burn (twice) than not achieve his political ambitions. So, for someone to “desecrate” such a significant event for them with a joke votes like this, was priceless. It was a reminder of how silly these new alliances are and how illegitimate this whole process was. Enough for someone to trigger the diehards into explaining to the rest of us what democracy is and how elections work, after they halted both for more than 2.5 years themselves. Priceless bait, perfectly executed and eagerly eaten up by most folks.
What’s Next
Many people are asking people who don’t support Aoun to give him a chance. I find that argument somewhat split from reality. Aoun didn’t descend from the heavens last weekend, he’s been a fixture in Lebanese politics and government for decades. Even if “The Doctor” now supports “The General”, you know how the Lebanese saying goes “s2al mjarreb, w la tes2al hakim” (ask someone who’s been through it/tried it, and not a doctor) and Lebanon has been through lots of Aoun periods. Army chief, exiled leader of a Christian party, anti-Assad, pro-Assad, pro-US, anti-Us and virtually any other possible political realignment, and none of them worked out for us (but worked brilliantly for him and his party). So, I’m not sure what the hopeful people are expecting this time around, cause there’s another cool saying that says something unflattering about repeating the same thing over and over and expecting different outcomes.
Movements like Beirut Madinati and You Stink rattled the political elites in 2015. So much so that they had to reshuffle their alliances to ensure they can keep splitting the cake amongst themselves without the people getting a bite. You’d think that hypocrisy in switching allegiances would shake Lebanese people’s faith in their politicians, but somehow, it has strengthened it.
Some folks that were in the streets demanding change last year, are now calling the new president their “dad” and a “strongman”. It is perhaps expected in times of fear and uncertainty that people resort to more authoritarian sides that feed on their insecurities and phobias, whether its sectarianism, their personal interpretations of what terrorism means and of course, fear-mongering about the refugee crisis.
This paints a bleak picture, with little hope of things changing for the better. I want to be optimistic and say, maybe under the Aoun presidency, people will learn their mistakes and support the right people next time, people like them and from them, not warlords and feudal lords who granted themselves amnesty after Lebanon’s 15-year civil war. Then again, all of Lebanon’s history tells me that will likely not happen in our lifetime.
So, we can’t but accept the current reality and try to adapt to it. Aoun is president now, so let’s pressure him to get the garbage off the streets and electricity in our homes and proper, affordable Internet on our phones and computers. Let’s undo the damage his party’s xenophobic and sectarian rhetoric has unleashed in hopes of getting him elected as president by force. Most importantly though, we need to make sure we get elections, and fast, with a law that is proportional at the very least, and non-sectarian at the very best.
Otherwise, for many of us, what little hope we have, if any, will be forever gone, for good this time, if parliament extends for itself one more time or if the elections are held under a law that unashamedly admits the districts are gerrymandered to guarantee each politician gets his cut, regardless of what the voters want.
